Is Suicide the answer?
(read the whole thing before you say anything ;)
I just read something that I wrote a couple years ago about not wanting to live anymore.. sooo ..I know some of you, not all of you know my testimony, and know how I grew up.
No my life was NOT totally unbearable, nor was i addicted to drugs at any time and lost myself in an addiction. Nor did I live on the streets at any time. But I still thought about suicide when I was growing up. MANY MANY times.
Growing up in a home that I did not feel safe in was difficult for me and even if it was a struggle. I had to realize that others had it worse then I did and needed help more then I saw fit to help me.
That all sounds so sad and lonely. I was sad and lonely. I really couldn't tell anyone what was happening to me, or so I thought. So I started telling God. Shouting at him yelling at him. "Why Me?"
I think when we are going through things we turn inward because we don't realize that someone else may have an answer for us. OR a way out! I turned inward and let Satan totally take control of my surroundings.
Let me explain what it means to let Satan take over...
It's sort of when you give in the the "negative" in life. You start feeling sad and give into depression, You choose paths that are going to destroy you in EVERY way possible. The Bible tells us that "...the enemy comes to kill steal and destroy." When we start turning into things like depression, and start acting on our jealousy... this is "causes" Satan can use. Commiting Suicide.. is destryoing your own life.. and others around you... so.. who do you think suicide would be an answer from?
Satan may not have control over your life, but he can still get in there and tell you lies... like
"I can't do that!"
"I'm not good enough for him/her. them. that calling."
Satan is a deciever and a manipulater. He's there to "scare" you out of a life with Christ. Falling into his ways is VERY dangerous to your Life In Christ.
When I was younger every single day (like i said above) I felt like the only way OUT for me was to kill myself. It would leave everyone without the burden of me. At the time I felt like no one cared for me or about me. Of course I never thought that it just SEEMED like they never cared about me.
and they still do.
when a person is on the verge of killing themselves, they show signs of it.. they let people know. But it's NEVER the answer, it's never the true answer and it IS NOT the will of God for anyones life.
If you think about it.. when you take your own life, you've in turn took a trust in yourself that YOU Know how to handle the problem you'll just totally avoid it.
When we have problems in life.. it's best (i don't like it) but it's best to take those problems head on! It WILL make you stronger when you finally do get over whatever HUMP is in your life, They may seem like BLOCKS more then a bump.
There is a praise/worship song called, "Beyond the Open Door." It's an AMAZING song. it goes...
"Beyond the open door. Is a new and fresh anointing. Hear the spirit calling. YOU TO COME!"
A BIble verse states, ".. seek and ye shall find. Knock and the door shall be opened..."
That sort of ties in all together with the worship song. If we're seeking Christ, and knocking at the "door" (Jesus) The spirit of God WILL in turn lead us to the door that God opens for us.
WE can not get to that place until we are diligently in prayer and diligently seeking Him
Before you think about suicide, understand that it's a selfish act. and it is unneccassary. God prepares us for our trials we just have to be earnest enough and relying on God enough to seek the answers from Him.
I've learned this over the years. This isn't some REVELATION I got tonight.
Feeling alone and vulnerable because your going through something heart breaking is very very painful. but it's not the end for you!
So.. to answer my question
NO suicide is NEVER the answer
Seeking God is!